Fuck It All

​(to the tune of If You’re Happy And You Know It)
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If you cannot find a lead, fuck it all
Or the rigging that you need, fuck it all
If there’s notches in the tow, and every string is bowed
If the captain doesn’t know then fuck it all

If she’s leaning to the bank, fuck it all
A foot of water in her tank, fuck it all
Why bother with the pump when the rain is gonna dump
And you’re paid just like a chump, so fuck it all

If you hear a crashing sound fuck it all
And the barges run aground fuck it all
If you’re leg’s caught in a bight and you cannot find your knife
And this isn’t worth your life then fuck it all

If the boss goes for a swim fuck it all
We wont throw a line for him- fuck it all
Our revenge for everything, we will watch him sink and sing
We can dredge him out next spring- so fuck it all. 


I wrote this song one day in the galley of a river towboat working in the Port of Saint Paul, towards the end of my first season there, with my friend Dee, who was my crewmate that year. I would sing it around the fleet for the rest of my time as a deckhand, including once during a "back to the galley" action we pulled in Savage in protest of unsafe conditions on deck during a snow storm.